You are in
- You see 1000s of guys with a backpack and an ID card wherever you go
- You see lakhs of girls with their hair let loose and a sporting strange attitude.
- Guys carry the backpacks even on weekends; when they are not carrying their laptops to work.
- People wear ill-fitting clothes and are in constant denial of the fact that they are gaining kilograms.
- Every Reddy, Kumar and Patil works for a software company.
- The supposedly ‘expensive’ Volvo buses are crowded but the ‘normal’ buses are empty.
- The auto drivers earn more than anybody else in the city.
- The house-owners give stiff competition to the auto-drivers in becoming the richest traders in the city.
- You have to sign a six page document to rent out a house but sign a two page document to buy one.
- The rules of notice periods are stringent if you want to leave the house, but relaxed if you want to leave your company.
- Every bus and billboard will be written in Kannada even if 75% of the people here don’t know the language.
- You will be always spoken to in Kannada, if you reply back in the broken Kannada that you know, you will get your next reply in your mother tongue. (
locals have a strange talent of identifying your mother tongue by the way you speak kannada) Bangalore
- You are allowed to bargain for 30% of the quoted price and still not let the conscience prick you.
- Everything seems costly and everyone seem to be cheating you in some way.
- Sentences like ‘Its very close… about 10kms… it will take just 45 mins for you to reach there’ do not have any hint of sarcasm.
- You need to plan your travel to the railway station more than you plan your travel to your destination.
- Talks about .Net, JAVA, hikes and openings are so prevalent that it makes you go sick of being a software engineer.
- All the places are either _____Halli or ______Palaya or some fancy English name given by the British (Brigade, Richmond etc).
- Cost of parking and the cost of a movie ticket are more or less the same.
- It makes you wonder if people just go to the malls to eat why do they have the food court on the top floor.
- You get McD burgers, KFC chicken, Dominos Pizzas everywhere but do not get a decent dosa anywhere. All the dosas available here are the awful sugary cousins of the real ones back in tamilnadu.
- You get the combo dishes and wonder what is combined with what?
- The SUVs rarely have party flags on its bonnet and also rarely carry more than one person.
- There will be a huge line of traffic caused by a person who is struggling to make a U-turn coz he bought a car before he could learn to drive as his company pays him crazy.
[Written just for fun.. Bangalore has a lot of positives.. great weather.. nice restaurants.. and lot more... ;-)]